Sunday, April 10, 2011

My two cents

I breastfeed. I do it because it is (the next thing to) free food for my child. It is healthy, natural and easy to get to. I like the bond that I have with my child because of it. I also feel it is easy- I never worry about running low or out and there is nothing to warm up and no bottles to mix. I can be lazy about it. I am not saying it is always easy, but for the most part it is easy for me.
I hate the slogan "breast is best." I know we are trying to teach moms that breast milk is best. However what we are doing is creating a line between breastfeeding moms and formula feeding moms and adding to the mommy wars.

I hate that even though I am told "breast is best," I am also told that I need to supplement with vitamin D because my breast milk actually does not provide ALL my baby needs to grow. The slogan states that "breast is best" but if you use formula you don't need to supplement at all. That does not make any sense.

I hate that I am told that "breast is best" but if I want to feed your child outside of my home please cover up or find a private place to do it. If breastfeeding is so wonderful why must I hide in a corner (or as one museum employee suggested, the bathroom) to feed my child?

It is natural and apparently something that most doctors want all moms to do, but we must hide while doing it lest we make others feel uncomfortable (and yes I used the word lest.) I don't eat under a blanket and my baby really prefers not to as well. I will be modest about the process but please don't glare at me for feeding my child. I would prefer not to become a recluse who cannot leave her house in order to do what "is best" for my child. A sane mommy is really the best thing for my child.

I hate that we as moms feel the need to compare each other. Yes there are bad moms out there. They hurt their children (and by this I do not mean feed them junk food or formula or let them watch tons of TV), or neglect their children. But most of us are just doing our best.

We try to learn from our mistakes. We try to raise our kids to be good people. Preferably healthy people. But since no people are identical it is unlikely that any two moms will parent identically.

Some would consider me to be a helicopter mom. I am trying VERY hard not to fit into that category but there are some who feel I fit well into that category. Either way, that does not make me a bad mom or a lesser mom.

I am an average, just good enough, trying her hardest mommy and I am proud of the job I am doing. I am also happy to learn from other mommies, whether they are average like me, or supermoms, or super crafty moms, or any kind of mom. We can all learn from each other, rather than warring against each other.

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