Thursday, October 27, 2011

Green Eyed Monster

Let me start out by stating that I love my life. It isn't perfect and that is okay. Perfect is kind of boring. Jon and I work hard to make our life the way we want it to be. We choose for me to be a stay at home mom. And that choice involves making choices about where and how we spend our money a little more carefully. And I am okay with that.

Most of the time.

Now and again I get bit by that green eyed monster. I get the "gimmees" as I call them when my kids ask for things. I want more than I have. I don't like that part of myself, but it is there.

I have been hearing about the upcoming vacations of friends. This past summer I was emailed about going on a Disney Cruise with some friends next September,a family trip. We had to say no. Last week when I was reading Facebook an acquaintance posted about planning her upcoming trip to Disney. Than this week a good friend wrote about planning her spring trip to Disney World.

I started to get jealous. I want to go to Disney World. I want my kids to have fun there and meet Mickey Mouse and the other characters. I want Jon and I to have a fun vacation with the kids. But we can't afford it. And right now that is bothering me.

But at the same time how can I complain? We CHOOSE for me to stay at home. We CHOOSE to live on one income. We CHOOSE to save rather than spend so we can stay out of debt. And we CHOOSE not to go on vacations so we can save money.

Jon and I could make different choices. I could go back to work full time. We could spend money and use credit cards and go into debt. We could decide not to move or buy a minivan and use that money to go on a vacation with the kids.

I don't like those choices. We want to move to a bigger house in a nicer town. We want to continue to manage our money well and stay out of debt. We want me to be at home with our kids. If forgoing a Disney (or other large) vacation is the choice we need to make for that to happen, then that is the way it will be. Yes I wish I could have both. But I also want a happy husband, and he is happy teaching his eighth graders about science. And we are both happy with me being at home with the kids. So we live on a teacher's salary. And we make choices that allow us to continue to do that.

I just remember that saying, you can't have your cake and eat it too.

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